Today's joke !

[ccperf721p]

MARIJUANA FILLED FIREWOOD'

'Hello, is this the Sheriff's Office?'

'Yes. What can I do for you?'

'I'm calling to report 'bout my neighbor Virgil Smith...He's hidin'
marijuana inside his firewood! Don't quite know how he gets it inside
them logs, but he's hidin' it there..'

'Thank you very much for the call, sir.'

The next day, twelve Sheriff's Deputies descend on Virgil's house.
They search the shed where the firewood is kept.
Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no
marijuana.

They sneer at Virgil and leave.

Shortly, the phone rings at Virgil's house.

'Hey, Virgil! This here's Floyd....Did the Sheriff come?'

Yeah!'

'Did they chop your firewood?'

'Yep!'

'Happy Birthday, buddy!'

[Daniel ~]

It's good to have neighbors!

[cloasters]

Aside from front and back doors ripped from their frames and a minor heart attack, Virgil is ahead.

[Daniel ~]

We can't be sure, they didn't find any pot. Now Floyd, there's one stone cold pot head if ever I saw one!

[cloasters]

It's possible that Virgil might return the favor. Feuding neighbors have been known to wreck a neighborhood.

[yodadude]

good clean fun!

[dsio]

Reading the first post, I really feel sorry for the woman that has to wake up next to that sense of humor each morning.

[chrisbard]

Aussie Love Poem

Of Course I Love Ya Darling
Your A Bloody Top Notch Bird
And When I Say Your Gorgeous
I Mean Every Single Word

So Ya Bum Is On The Big Side
I Dont Mind A Bit Of Flab
It Means That When I'm Ready
Theres Somethin There To Grab

So Your Belly Isnt Flat No More
I Tell Ya, I Dont Care
So Long As When I Cuddle Ya
I Can Get My Arms Around There

No Sheila Who Is Your Age
Has Nice Round Perky Breasts
They Just Gave Into Gravity
But I Know Ya Did Ya Best

Im Tellin Ya The Truth Now
I Never Tell Ya Lies
I Think Its Very Sexy
That Youv Got Dimples On Ya Thighs

I Swear On Me Nannas Grave Now
The Moment That We Met
I Thought U Was As Good As
I Was Ever Gonna Get

No Matter Wot U Look Like
Ill Always Love Ya Dear
Now Shut Up While The Footys On
And Get Me Another Beer!

[dsio]

Originally Posted by chrisbard

So Ya Bum Is On The Big Side
I Dont Mind A Bit Of Flab
It Means That When I'm Ready
Theres Somethin There To Grab

Nothing wrong with having a bit of meat on the bones. Chubby girls are always better in bed than skinny girls =D

[chrisbard]

Originally Posted by chrisbard

Aussie Love Poem

No Matter Wot U Look Like
Ill Always Love Ya Dear
Now Shut Up While The Footys On
And Get Me Another Beer!

Here is a no comment

[chrisbard]

HillaryClintonJokes.com - Hillary Clinton Jokes Cartoons Pictures

[Daniel ~]

Originally Posted by dsio

Nothing wrong with having a bit of meat on the bones. Chubby girls are always better in bed than skinny girls =D

Always is such a 'dangerous' term... given the male inclination towards verity and alcohol..."always' seems such an ephemeral thing...":O}

[ccperf721p]

Dan was a single guy living at home with his father and working in the family business.
When he found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed a wife with which to share his fortune.
One evening at an investment meeting he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty took his breath away.
"I may look like just an ordinary man," he said to her, "but in just a few years, my father will die, and I'll inherit 20 “million dollars."
Impressed, the woman obtained his business card and three days later, she became his stepmother...

[cloasters]

Lol!

[aarathi]

Nice jokes. Please make like these jokes. We get relaxation in our work by reading these type of jokes.

[chrisbard]

YouTube - Ali G FBI interview

YouTube - Ali G -Dangerous Drugs UK

YouTube - ali g dangerous Weapons

YouTube - Ali-g and Gail Porter every breath you take

[chrisbard]

YouTube - Ali G Invents the Ice Cream Glove

PMSL @ PS2 joke

[chrisbard]

Blonde paint job

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.

"Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"
The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"
The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch."

A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."

[Daniel ~]

OMG I hope she painted with the Grain!!

[Samuknow]

That rocks....

Great blonde joke Chris...